I forgot to post about the 29th.

Michelle and Jas mum came over to tutor me.

POA was first. Totally forgot everything.

Kena drilled by Jas Ma. xD
Around 11.45 was Maths.

Okay la. She went through my stuff and found things I don't think I could ever find.

Alot of test papers.

Do until 2+ then both of us brain dead.

She brain dead first though. :3

They left at around 2.30+

I was somewhat expecting a "Hello? Lost already." Call.

Woo~ At least I did their homework.

Well. Most of it. Some I don't know how.

Shall ask on friday.

I hate you guys.

Yes. That's right.

You bastards who are in my section.

You fuckbrains you played me out.

You will NEVER talk to me ever again.

Guys like you irk me.

What I needed was someone to cheer me up.

Yet you guys ignore me.

You guys push me down further into my breakdown.

I've had it. Enough of your bullshit.

It's time I've given up.

My feelings locked away.

My heart thrown to another side.

You've pushed me to the edge. You didn't tell me anything!

To you my sweet dear.

However much I love you. I have to let go.

For to love is to let go. I'm sorry.

I've lost all trust in all of you.

9 People To Tag:
Mimi

Michelle
Jaslyn

Jocelyn
Wen Qian

Gwen
Shakina

Gwen
Iscariot

1. Pick a word that begins with the first letter of your name.
R iot! -sardonic grin-

2. Who are you missing right now?
Etto.. 4 Godmothers, bestfriend.. Her.

3. Your ex shows up randomly at your house , what do you say?
Hmm? Hello. What you doing here?

4. How many bedrooms are in your house?
3.

5. Is there a reason for your profile song ?
It's nice. Reminds me of my darker past.

6. Do you hate the last girl you were talking to?
Nic? Ehh. No.

7. Who was your last text message from ?
bestfriend LOL.

8. What time did you wake up this morning ?
11.16am.

9. If someone liked you right now , would you want them to tell you ?
Yes. I'd rather someone be direct than beat around the bush. 

10. Did you mean it when you last said "i love you" ?
Yes.

11. Is it okay if you kiss people when you're single ?
Depends on who actually.

12. What is wrong with you now ?
I'm too lazy and forgetful. xD

13. Do you think you'll be married in 10 years?
Maybe. Depends.

14. Would you kiss someone to make your ex bf/gf mad ?
No. The heck?

15. Do you believe exes can really ever be "just friends"?
Ehhh? Yeah, why not?

16.Do you use T9 , word or abc?
T9. abc occasionally.

17.Do you tell your mum everything?
Nope. Like hell I'll tell her.

18. Who was the last person you cried in front of ?
Etto.. Yurong, Jia Ling and Nic. Wait. Jia Qi also.

19. Have you told anybody you loved them today?
Nope. I rarely say so.

20.Who can you trust ?
bestfriend.

Quiz 2.
1. Besides Your Lips, Where Is Your Favourite Spot To Get Kissed?
cheeks. Cliche lol.

2. How Did You Feel When You Woke Up This Morning?

Sleepy. Somewhat hungry.

3. Who Was The Last Person You Took A Picture Of?
Lcuas with his JabbaWockeeZ mask on.

4. Would You Consider Yourself To Be Spoiled?
No. I do the housework and buy my own stuff. >.>

5. Would You Ever Donate Blood?
Yes. I wanna be a samatarian.

6. Have You Ever Had A Best Friend Who Was Of The Opposite Sex?
Current one IS. =.=

7. Do You Want Someone Dead?
Yep. -stupid smile-

8. What Does Your Last Text Message Says?
Your friend going for the movie(Twilight) or not?

9. What Are You Thinking Right Now?
What I have to do after christmas.

10. Do You Wish Someone Was With You Right Now?
Yeah. wishful thinking LOL.

11. What Time Did You Go To Sleep Last Night?
2.03am.

12. Where Did You Buy The Shirt You're Wearing Now?
Passed down from dad. Ask him.

13. Is Someone On Your Mind Right Now?
My mind is a complete blank right now.

14. Who Was The Last Person To Text You?
bestfriend.

The 9 person you just tagged:
Mimi

Michelle
Jaslyn

Jocelyn
Wen Qian

Gwen
Shakina

Lucas
Iscariot

15.Who Is The Number 2 Having A Relationship With?
Michelle? Single I think.

16. Is 3 A Male Or A Female?
 Female .

17. What Is Number 1 Studying About?
I don't know what she's taking for poly. =_-

18. When Was The Last Time You Had A Chat With Them?
Some is last ngiht. some is a few months ago. One dunno how long alr.

19. Is Number 4 Single?
Should be. Not sure though.

20.Say Something About Number 2.
Very kind. Even though she's the main body of the 4 devils.

21. What Do You Think About Number 3 And 6 Being Together?
They aren't lesbian. They don't even know each other!

22.Describe Number 9.
Terrific liar. Epic fail as God.

23. What Will You Do If Number 6 And 7 Fights?
Doubt it. don't even know each other.

Quiz 3.
1. What’s your nickname?
Don't know. ask my classmates. I can't remember.

2. How old are you?
Fifteen. I want eighteen damnit.

3. When’s your birthday?
150793

4. What’s your special skill?
Being retarded so that people will laugh or roll their eyes.

5. What’s your horoscope?
Cancer. Not the illness you brainless shit.

6. Who pass this survey to you?
Nicole Fiona Laurens

7. She’s your….?
bestfriend.

8. What you wanna talk to him/her?
I don't know. depends on what's happening.

9. What you think about him/her?
pretty and adorable.

10. When you know him/her?
Sec 1 or 2.

11. How’s her attitude?
Vain but very kind.

12. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Nope. (:

13. If one day , your lover tell you that he/she loves you too , how will you do ?
Happened already. I was happy. yet solemn.

14. Are you well-being now?
Uhh. Yeah, I guess.

15. Why god give you courage ?
I have no god you brainless shit of a jackass.

16. Who’s the people that you like ?
Got let's see.. 4 plus one plus one.. Six. I won't say who though.

17. Which color you like most ?
Midnight black with silver or white.

18. God give you 4 wishes:
1) Better attitude to studying!
2)Her .
3) Get to Sec 5 and then poly with no trouble.
4) My rose pink PSP.

19. Do you like to smile and laugh ?
Yeah. makes people worry less and makes me forget about stuff.

I think I'll update.

Okay. To start off.

I need to start studying after Christmas.

That means mugging from the start of Boxing day,

-box box box-(Can't help it.)

Till N levels.

一妈 Michelle told me to start soon.

Actually, I got her to thank. 

If not, I wouldn't bother I think.

I'm gonna slaughtered by 二妈 Jas though. 

Forgot everything for POA. -Laughs like an idiot-

Tuition will be hell. I know it.

It's happened once. It will happen again.

They (All four of them) are the self proclaimed 四大恶鬼, each more dangerous than the other.

With the two biggest ones tutoring me. Better start revising early.

Don't wanna get nagged at.

But I'm surprised.

Quite kind you know. So I really appreciate it.

-Laughs like a complete idiot again-

But I sorta envy them.

They've got so many people to rely on.

So many who they can talk to.

Heh. Make me feel a-bit outta place in this world we call home.

I'm tired. Sick and tired of struggling to live through another day.

With that facade that's been melted into my original personality.

I don't know what I should do to finish what I started.

Oh. I'm ranting again. 

Tsk. I need a psychologist I guess. -shrug-

Maybe a shrink?

Anyway! 2 more days before Twilight movie outing.

Hope 一妈 will be able to make it and hopefully drag 二，三和四妈 along.

Well. Not them also can.

I'm not really putting my hopes up high. -smiles stupidly-

Right. Shall end this post here.

I need to wash my shoes and sweep the floor!

See y'all!

xxx

RYAN™

Lucas came over yesterday.
Then, he stayed over till today.
-Le gasp-
Okay. Before that. Let's REWIND.
Wednesday, Lucas came over.
Went off to Dhoby Ghaut to buy the theatrical masks.
The ones that the JabbaWockeeZ wear.
After that, Went to Orchard.
Met Nicole and her cousin, Atiqah.
Kept them company till five.
Then Lucas train-ed home.
I continued to keep them company till 6 plus.
Train-ed home and hit home by 7.
Dad was pissed at me.
Sms-ed Nic on the way home.
There are people who think Lucas and I are CUTE.
Don't know what to say.
Then Yesterday, Lucas came again, this time to stay over.
Both of us snuck out to Dhoby again to meet Nic and Atiq.
But by the time we reach, they at Orchard.
What the fish! So we go 7-Eleven buy some drinks then train-ed back home.
After that used the VBA play some random games.
Search for some codebreaker codes.
They don't work. The fish.
After that played till 1+ am then go do some vocal warm ups.
Then sang some songs on Lucas's iPod.
Sang finish then Lucas went to sleep.
I played Dynasty Warriors 2 on his PSP till 5am.
Then sleep till 10.55am.
After that played Dynasty Warriors 2 again.
Then washed up, had breakfast and played Pokemon again.
Played till 5.45.
Lucas went off to bathe then he packed up and train-ed home.
After that sms-ed Nic abit and chatted with her on the phone.
Now on MSN with her. Cheer up girl!
Mood Swings suck! Anything tell me.

xxx
RYAN™

----------------
Now playing: Jabbawockeez Master-Mix Compilation (Music Only)
via FoxyTunes

Okay. Shall post before midnight.
Yesterday came back from Lucas's house.
Went to Nic's place first.
Went there slack, chat and play.
I got drum sticks!
Courtesy of Nicole F. Laurens.
I would post pics but I swore never to have a pic post.
So click Nicole or Diyana for the pics. >;3
Went to the playground to walk and play
It rained though.
And about the rain.
Rain water in the North tastes freakin lousy.
The rain water in the East. Especially at Tampines, Eunos and Pasir Ris rocks.
West and South are so-so. Wouldn't say it's nice, but not bad either.
Anyway, back to topic! :3
After playing in the rain, chatting for nuts and taking pics, we went back
Watched abit of Drake and Josh.
Kudos to Josh for losing weight. If he can do it, so can you Nic! X3
After that walked to MRT station with Dee.
Crapped about certain matters of past.
After that, parted and trained home.
And with that, it pretty much sums up yesterday. :3
Yey! Tomorrow, Lucas is coming!
Not sure gonna do what though. LOL.
Let nature take it's own course.
Then we'll see what we do. Oh. 3 vids for you people.
Presenting. The...

JabbaWockeeZ

JabbaWockeeZ- Ayo Technology remix.


JabbaWockeeZ- Apologize Remix


JabbaWockeeZ- Step Up2 Deleted Scene


JabbaWockeeZ- PYT


JabbaWockeeZ- All That Jazz


Yep! I lied. HA!

xxx
RYAN™

Before you ask, No.
I am not letting anyone into my private blog.
Well.
Actually, maybe.
If you asked me.
If you're special enough to me, sure.
But that'll depend on how I view you.

xxx
RYAN™


----------------
Now playing: T. Rex - 20th Century Boy
via FoxyTunes

Ehh! 100th post!
Didn't think I'd have 100 posts.
In a year that is. Maybe more?
Not gonna commemorate or anything.
But I just realized this.
I'm letting go of the heavy burden.
Bit by bit, slowly but surely.
The grudge will still be there.
That is true no doubt.
But this burden of sadness and anger.
It's leaving me.
Though it feels the world is still on my shoulders.
Thanks to Irina(Eee-Ree-Nah!) and L.Bolts(I know you'll recognize this!).
Thanks for giving me advice and listening to me.
You've helped me so much.
Even though all you've done is just listen and speak you opinion.
It means a-lot to me.
Thank you.
God Bless You.

xxx
RYAN™

----------------
Now playing: Simple Plan- I Can Wait Forever
via FoxyTunes

I'm feeling slightly better.
But still, depressed.
I'm keeping my promise to my two important girls though.
To not think of suicide.
Hah.
One of them..
Sometime, I hate that I love you.
But yet. I can wait forever.
Even after my heart has been grounded to dust.
Like a blade that cuts right through me..

xxx
RYAN™

I'm back from Malaysia!
Sigh.
Feeling depressed.
But it's not as bad as during the trip.
I did something wrong I think.
Yet no one told me.
Then everyone just plays me out.
If I was really depressed I'd yell vulgarities.
But I won't.
Thank you Nicole.
If not for you, I'd still be a wreck.
Okay. On to the main subject.
5 guys. Just so you 5 can camp in someone elses room.
You play me out. I don't mind being alone whatsoever.
Nor do I mind that I'm ignored.
But you play me out.
You call yourselves friends?
I beg to differ.
If the 5 of you really were friends.
You would've passed up on the chance.
But if memory serves.
You 5 decided to 'pang seh' me.
So that you can camp.
You disappoint me.
I thought I could trust you as much as Nicole.
Now you've shown me your true colors.
You 5 could very well hang out with them.
I'll just free drift. As I always have..
And Joanna.. Please. I need to talk to you.
I need to ask you a few things.
Please...

xxx
RYAN™